Raising Whole Kids in a Broken Marriage
When Staying for the Kids Isn’t Enough and What Your Children Really Need
The unflinching, faith-grounded guide for Christian parents trapped between staying “for the kids” and protecting them from ongoing harm. This book tells the truth most Christian resources won’t.
The Book Traditional Christian Resources Won’t Write
You’ve been told that staying married is always best for your children. But what if the home you’re preserving is the very thing destroying them?
💔 For Parents in Crisis
Navigating abuse, addiction, betrayal, or chronic dysfunction while trying to protect your children from collateral damage.
📖 Biblically Grounded
93 Scripture references woven throughout. Honors covenant without compromising safety. Challenges “stay at all costs” theology with depth.
🛡️ Trauma-Informed
Understanding how chronic stress affects developing minds. No minimizing, no blame-shifting, no spiritual bypassing.
🗺️ Practical Guidance
Safety planning checklists, counselor screening questions, age-appropriate scripts for talking to kids, crisis resources.
“This is not a book about choosing divorce. This is a book about choosing truth—whatever that requires.”
What’s Inside
Part One: Telling the Truth
- Chapter 1: The Lie We Tell Ourselves — What “staying for the kids” really means
- Chapter 2: The Four Types of “Staying” — Only one creates possibility of health
- Chapter 3: The Emotional Weight Your Children Are Carrying — What they see vs. what you think they see
Part Two: When Staying Becomes Enabling
- Chapter 4: The Difference Between Patience and Enabling — Four tests to know which you’re doing
- Chapter 5: The Five Invisible Wounds — What chronic dysfunction does to developing minds
Part Three: Parenting in the Ruins
- Chapter 6: Parenting Alone While Still Married — Strategies when you’re doing it alone
- Chapter 7: Breaking the Cycle — Teaching healthy patterns despite the dysfunction
Part Four: When Leaving Becomes Wisdom
- Chapter 8: When Separation Protects Your Children — The question no one wants to answer
- Chapter 9: Safety Planning with Children — Step-by-step guidance for high-risk situations
Part Five: The Long View
- Chapter 10: Raising Whole Kids — Whether your marriage survives or not
Plus Essential Resources
✓ Crisis Resources & Hotlines
✓ Safety Planning Checklist
✓ Counselor Screening Questions
✓ Recommended Reading List
✓ 93 Scripture References Indexed
Who This Book Is For
✓ This Book Is FOR You If:
- ✓ You’re in an abusive, addictive, or chronically dysfunctional marriage
- ✓ You’ve been told to “just pray harder” but see your children deteriorating
- ✓ You’re parenting alone while still married
- ✓ You wonder if staying is actually enabling
- ✓ You need permission to see clearly without shame
- ✓ You want biblical wisdom that doesn’t minimize abuse
⚠️ This Book Is NOT For You If:
- ✗ You’re looking for “10 tips to fix your marriage”
- ✗ You want someone to tell you what decision to make
- ✗ You believe divorce is never biblical under any circumstance
- ✗ You’re unwilling to question church teachings that enable abuse
- ✗ You want easy answers or spiritual clichés
- ✗ You’re looking for marriage enrichment resources (try our “Marriage Foundation” series instead)
What Readers Are Saying
“This book gave me permission to protect my children without shame. It’s the resource I desperately needed but couldn’t find anywhere else in Christian publishing.”
— Sarah M.
Mother of 3, United Kingdom
“Finally, a Christian author who doesn’t minimize abuse or blame victims. This is the book every pastor should read before counseling struggling marriages.”
— Pastor David O.
Church Leader, Nigeria
“I was drowning in guilt for considering leaving. This book helped me see that protecting my children was the most faithful thing I could do. Life-changing.”
— Jennifer T.
Single Mother, United States
About Rev. Sam Adeyemi
Rev. Sam Adeyemi is an international pastor, bestselling Christian author, and catalyst for courageous faith in seasons of crisis. Founder of Covenant Marriage Help and Powerhouse HolyGhost Ministry International, his work refuses to spiritualise harm or minimize pain.
With a unique blend of pastoral compassion, trauma-informed insight, and strategic clarity, Sam has walked alongside hundreds of families at breaking point—helping them discern wise, life-giving next steps.
Read Full StoryYour Children Are Watching
They’re watching to see if telling the truth is worth it.
If boundaries are real. If love can exist without fear.
If there’s life on the other side of heartbreak.
The story you write now will shape the stories they tell themselves for the rest of their lives.
Available in Paperback ($17.99) and Kindle ($9.99) | Audiobook Coming Soon
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